B Sic

I want to start an AA meeting called B Sic
which stands for Being Sober is Cool
but I am not sure that it really is
or whether any of that actually matters at all.

It is possible to have your heart ripped out of your chest
beating pumping beautifully bloody
and alive
and then, through the immaculate beauty of sorrow,
have it handed back to you
in tact
effortlessly free
and re-covered.

Being rescued is lovely
all these little islands of despair
where the ship of some larger horror shows you your grace.

I thank god every day for showing up inside of you
and reminding me
that we are the same.

I have not seen my boys since 8:23 this morning -
when I watched them walk in a single-file line
into the school house.

I hit AA and recovery and belligerence and faith HARD today
squirreled it all up
inside a cupcake
with a friend
on a street
in LA.

All I am saying is that she is beautiful
those newly seeing eyes
all green and hazel and glorious.
We sat side by side and were thankful
to know each other
and be a friend.